Afternoon Delight?

I chaperoned a zoo field trip for my first grader's class today. We only had about 2 1/2 hours at the zoo, so I asked each child to pick one thing they absolutely had to see.


First picks were the snakes (awesome!) and the komodo dragon (total bust). Then someone said, "The lions!" This was followed by a frenzy of screams for the lions, so after an exciting round of snakes, amphibians and other reptiles, we were off to the lions.


It seemed to take forever as we weaved through rhinos and elephants and other animals that don't do much and smell awful to boot. Then we arrived at the lions who were. . .


wait for it. . .


laying down and yawning.


Nice.


No sooner had I muttered, "What a rip" to myself than I received much, much more than my money's worth. The lioness got up sashayed around and nudged the lion on the rump. Then she walked around and plopped back on the ground.


The lion then stood, stretched, and yawned in that slow long-suffering way that reminded me of an old man listening to his wife's nagging or prattling and he then proceeded to walk over and mount the lioness right there -- in front of God and country, and in front of the little first graders!


I was stunned into stupidity at first, then, my reflex was to avert my eyes -- I mean clearly they needed privacy. But like the lions, I'd forgotten about the children in my awkwardness.


Their confused protests of "What are they doing?" and "Are they fighting?" and "That doesn't look like fighting." shook me out of my temporary loss of mind function.


Think fast.


I announced it was time to get moving -- brilliant, right? Wrong. They protested on the grounds that it took forever just to get here. Umm, umm, I tried to think fast, but I had absolutely nothing.


Then, like a wonderful rainbow in a pragmatic thunderstorm, a single voice rang out.

"They stopped!"


That's right, both lions were now side by side again. The lioness looking unphased, the lion looking bored and moderately put upon.


It was over. The children moved on as they are wont to do. But I, I just felt dirty, and a small part of me spent the rest of the afternoon wishing even now that I could just wash my eyes.