Ah, so we are 3 days in to the month of thanksgiving and already the fur is a-flying.
Today's question: Is it appropriate to place expectations on gratitude?
I have my own theories on whether it is appropriate to place expectations on people's actions in general, but we are getting ahead of ourselves here. For now, the issue I'd like to explore is that of expectations for gratitude.
Specifically, what I expect you to be thankful for and how I expect you to demonstrate that appreciation.
This week Facebook status updates in my little corner of the universe have been sharing what folks are thankful for. Sounds innocent enough, right? Apparently not.
You know that tradition of not naming names during acceptance speeches lest someone be forgotten? There has to be a little wisdom there. I've heard of a couple different scenarios in which a person's gratitude shoutout left someone feeling snubbed.
Are thank you's like chewing gum? Should you not dare to "unwrap a stick" unless you brought enough for everyone?
Now here's a sticky wicket if I've ever seen one. What if I'm thankful for friend A, but now friend B is hurt? Am I supposed to not be thankful to friend A? Should I keep it a secret, lest I offend? If so, how is that fair to friend A? If this is the case, when does it end? And -- I know I'm being a tad ballsy here, but what the hey -- at what point do adults need to take responsibility for their own choices?
Call me crazy, but when we act in kindness I thought it we were supposed to do so with no strings attached. Then again, that would be me extending my expectations on others and this is how we ended up here in the first place.
Long sigh.
So today's blog is less about me discovering insight and more about me arriving at a conclusion without any real way too express my reasonining. For me it's a gut feeling that says sometimes, every now and again, folks might need to take a breath, pull on their big girl (or boy) pants, and get over themselves.
On the flipside, I've been there -- on the corner of "What about me?" and "Why do I even bother?" avenues. I'm not proud of it, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that it stings when I contribute and someone else gets the accolades.
Petty? Maybe.
Human? Undeniably.
I can't help wondering about this one and wishing I had the sense that I know exactly where I stand on it. Moreover, I can't help wondering what others think so give me whatchagot!
Until next,
